Wiccan Witch Sells Booty Enhancement Spells on eBay

Try as you might, that ass ain't getting any bigger. Despite your longing to be bootylicious, your trunk remains devoid of junk. You've done numerous hours on the stair master, and eaten countless pints of Ben & Jerry's, and still, that ass remains flat as a pancake.

Luckily, there's a Wiccan witch offering a special booty enhancement spell on eBay.

Amelia, the Wiccan Witch of the eBay, typically casts the spells herself, although sometimes she enlists the help of her coven. She's been casting spells and enlarging posteriors for 20+ years. She says they "are strong and very effective." Since the spells are done at the alter she has, and the booty boost travels to you by magic, there is no shipping and handling fee. Your rounder rump should arrive within 24-48 hours.